Life as a Working Mom
The words “I want to bake glasses, mommy”, as if they were cookies, will never leave my head. Poor girls, I thought back then. They think it’s normal for moms to bake martini glasses!!
Even better was getting a call from my daughter’s principal. He hesitated to tell me that my youngest, Mary Margaret, was drawing glasses that would hold alcohol. He inquired “was there a problem at home?” LOL.
I thought about it for a millisecond and then kept going, nothing could stop me.
If the following sounds like I’m bragging, I guess I am a little, like most moms do. When writing about being a working Mom, I decided only complete honesty would fit the bill.
My kids were with me from day one and witnessed me building this brand from scratch. I used my artistic ability and creative marketing skills, showing them that it is okay to be creative and smart while having fun.
I had the faith that I could build young women by example, like I was raised. And that is exactly what I did. I had the belief that because of how I raised them, they would be very successful and happy.
The second my parents witnessed me arranging the food on my highchair by color, they knew I was creative. I was always encouraged with my creativity. By them leaving me to it, it was a hands-off approach. “Hands off, let her do it.” I used this same approach with my own kids.
So, my girls grew up with paint and glitter everywhere! Believe me, it’s heaven for kids if this is you!! But the same will be true with anything that makes you totally and unequivocally happy.
I always had “mommy’s work” and encouraged them to play. I didn’t sit on the floor and play Barbie's with them. Moms don’t play Barbie's, I thought…they become Barbie. They become anything they want to become. And I believe that’s why my daughters are both so creative AND analytical…. I gave them the space to be themselves.
When I was feeling the passion burning inside of me to make this thing successful, it led to even more creativity. That seemed to be good for the girls, not bad!!! They were seeing me exhausted and crying (and drinking wine... but I am Lolita, lol) but SOOOO happy and driven. They witnessed my tears, baking and breaking glassware, as well as painting almost everything I could get my hands on.
They realized that sometimes mommy goes away when she does trade shows out of town, but she always comes home. Looking back on how guilty I felt not being at their games/plays/poetry presentations, I handled it right and have no regrets! They knew I had dreams, and that mom can’t be at everything. I really can remember only a few times when I couldn’t show up, either for performances, games or when they were sick. Those were my biggest “be present” things while working.
Now they have grown up and are smart and beautiful young women that amaze me. They have incredible drive, ambition, and ability to land the best positions in their chosen fields in only their mid 20’s. To be stars of their companies in positions of leadership, both have seen promotion after promotion since they graduated from college. That doesn’t surprise me at all, how amazingly talented they are, and raised in pretty much a single parent household.
Truth is, kids don’t always know what they want, what with peer pressure, other mom pressure and now the dangers of social media. They have yet to discover what they want. To be happy adults, they should be happy kids and kids are happiest when they are doing what they feel the best at.
Give them that. The space to be themselves, doing things they love doing.
The funny thing as I raised them was that I was just being me, and doing what was in my soul. For my kids to witness their mom this way, I think, is the secret. Do what you love, teach by example. The world has enough stressors. I think I raised them the right way. That through my example, they are well rounded, kind, amazing humans that are well set for life. They witnessed my path, from shopping at Walmart to saving my change in a coin jar to have money for paints.
Revisit what you are doing. Are you happy with your choices while your kids are little? Your children will love you for choosing what fills your heart, making difficult decisions to be happy yourself! Show your kids that it matters to do what you love and to do it with excellence, but make sure they know about your mistakes.
Also, make sure you have a coin jar so they can see you saving pennies and using them to make yourself happy. They will in turn do the same.
Don’t compete with other moms!!! I can’t reiterate this enough. You’ll be happier.
Be the working mom extraordinaire, whether making money or not, but being happy. You deserve to make yourself happy!!! Kids NEED to see it’s not all about them.
